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Q– I have been dating this woman I met 7 weeks ago. Since then, we have gone on five dates and will go on our sixth date tomorrow. I have noticed that I have to initiate calling/texting her. If I call or text her, she will respond. However, she will not usually call or text me out of the blue.
In addition, I have noticed that she does not seem to be “too touchy.” I put my arm around her, and she seems somewhat uncomfortable. I am confused since we have gone on five dates and yet physically it feels like we are on the second date. I am wondering if I am falling into the “Good for now guy” or the “Too nice guy trap.” What should I do?
A–I recommend that after your next date you state, “I can never tell if a woman is interested and wants me to keep calling or not. If a woman calls me on occasion, sends me a brief e-mail, or texts me every once in a while, it really encourages me to keep calling.” Then state, “I would love to go out soon. Let’s plan something.” Over the next week, watch to see if she calls, texts, or e-mails. If she doesn’t, call toward the end of the week rather than at the beginning of the week. Set a date and watch to see if she calls or texts at all in between. If not, she probably views you as being on her good-for-now or just-friends list and is not willing to invest in you.
I hope that helps. Let me know how she responds.
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