“He wants to have phone sex. What should I do?” – Q & A

The important point here is if he will pursue what he needs in a way that respects both your needs, not just his. If you don’t feel comfortable with phone sex (which I believe is not consistent with religious values or teachings) than you need to assert your feelings of discomfort with it. Tell him what you do feel comfortable with and see how he responds.

For example, “I don’t feel comfortable having in-depth or sensual conversations about sex in the early stages of dating. I do feel comfortable having practical and educational conversations about sex when engaged and prior to marriage. I don’t feel comfortable engaging in random sexual contact, even if we aren’t having sexual intercourse. I do feel comfortable kissing and showing sweet affection.”

I hope that helps. His response will reveal his intentions (i.e. to get what he wants or to negotiate and find a way to meet both of your needs because your feelings matter too).

Good luck.

Let me know how it works out.

Alisa

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