First Date Don’ts – Peter’s thoughts

I went out with a lady that has been attending your class. I enjoyed being with her. There were a lot of things about her that I liked. I’ve been meeting and dating a lot over the past year since divorcing last year. I’m not sure if I will see her again.

She told me about your class. I’m sure that I could learn a lot. I’ll have to read more on your site and maybe some of your articles or books. It might be fun to be a part of your feedback program for your new book.

I decided to drop you a line. I noticed something about the date that I wanted to share with you. It is nothing new. I’ll bet you’ve gone over it and heard it a million times. But it has to do with conversation. Or maybe I should say the lack of it. It was really one-sided. She talked constantly about her self and situation and past relationships. We watched a movie after dinner and she commented all the way through it about obvious things. I had a friend there and he commented after “so are you done with that one”? I actually really liked her. But I thought wow for someone working on dating techniques she sure isn’t seeing that important point. I tried to interject several times and she would say “go ahead, I’m sorry I interrupted you”. I’m sure that part of it was nervousness. But it was definitely an experience. Not the first time actually. So I think that it is a big problem. I thought at one point that I could go several minutes without saying a word without her noticing it. She didn’t ask many questions about me. Not that I need to talk about myself. It’s just that I want her to get to know me to. It’s not all up to me if I see her again.

I hope that feedback helps. I think that it would make all the difference if she had a better feel for “conversation”. Oh and one other thought that I am learning myself. Don’t say negative things about past relationships or spouses. Until you know more about a person you might be commenting on similar weaknesses or traits. I also had the thought “I wonder what she will say about me”. So being negative early on does not make a good impression.

I’m not perfect. I don’t mean to come across that way. I would hope that I could accept feedback from others if given the opportunity.

Best regards, Peter

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